Sunday, January 20, 2008
I woke up with puffy eyes today.. Slept at 5am this morning..Well, no one did anything to make me cry. No one.
But I just did so... After reading it..
I wonder why I can cry so much over movies, drama serials and books. It's like, the tears juz well up uncontrollably. Is it just me, or do alot of gals do that too? I wonder. It's been long since I cried like that over a book. The last was over James Patterson's novel. But well, it wasn't even half of what I teared yesterday over Judith McNaught's Perfect. Thanks to Val for lending me this book.
The book talks about the love story of Zachary Benedict and Julie Mathison. Zach was a well known Hollywood director and Actor, who had several academic awards in his bag. (it was interesting to see names like Kevin Costner, Barbara Streisand and Jack Nicholson appearing the book, as well as the glam parties of Hollywood, as well as how it depicts the crew and their roles during a movie filming). Due to a bad childhood, where he was outcasted and thrown out of home, Zach basically shut everyone out of his life. Despite being devastatingly charming and devilish handsome, he had built this wall around his heart and had a cold attitude towards many things in life.
Judith was a school teacher in her small but warm hometown. She too, had a bad childhood as she was abandoned by her parents right after birth. She went on the wrong side of life, and took up habits like pickpocketing, hot wiring cars and lying to everyone around her. At age of 11, she couldn't even read directional nor toilet signs, despite being an extremely bright kid. Her life took a turn for the better when the Mathisons adopted her and treated her as if she was really their little princess. She grew up to be a real pretty lady with a lot of heart and goodness in her to offer, and she taught the handicapped children and also started courses for women who couldn't read. (now, that is something i will wanna do!!) I love this line from her, she said that teaching grown women who cannot read, and helping them to pick up confidence in their lives, is like 'holding a miracle in your hand'.
Anyway, the gist is, during a movie that Zach directed, which involved gun shots in the last scene, his wife Rachel was killed when the bullets, supposedly to be empty shells, were swapped with real bullets instead. Zach, who had walked into the hotel room previous nite and caught Rachel and her lover commiting adultery in bed, became the prime suspect since he was also the director who changed the script at the last minute and caused Rachel to be the victim instead. As a result, he was convicted to 45 years in jail. 45 YEARS! for a murder he did not commit.
After 5 dreadful years in jail, he decided to break out. (oh yeah, i was reminded of Prison Break when i read this part). He had the perfect plan with perfect help from his fren's relative whom he paid a quarter million. Haha. However, things went abit wrong in the middle, and he was stranded without a car with all the FBI right on his heels and he was a wanted man and news was broadcasted all over the country. (don't forget he's a hollywood star who had charmed the whole female population previously!) By a twist of fate, he ended up 'kidnapping' Julie who happened to be driving home alone that day. By threatening her with a gun, which he would never have used and would never have hurt her, he got Julie to do what he wanted, to drive up to his deserted house in Colorado.
It was there that they spent a full week, and well, though they were loggerheads every now and then, and Julie tried to escape twice, somehow fate still brought them together. I love the part where she secretly escaped using a snowmobile, and Zach kept chasing after her in another. When he saw her overturned mobile, he thought that she must have fallen into the icy lake. Truth is, she was hiding in some pine trees behind, watching his every move and devising her alternative escape route. She witnessed Zach removing his jacket and throwing himself into the icy lake, searching and calling frantically for Julie. Which, as a result, caused him to half freeze to death. When he could not find her, he simply sat down, without his jacket, and attempted to let himself freeze to death. Julie was shocked, and deeply moved. She tried to revive him when he fainted and with determination, flipped his body onto the snowmobile and brought him back to the house, covering him with tonnes of quilt beside the fireplace. That was when they discovered their passion for each other. The kidnapped falling in love with the kidnapper. What a plot.
Well, I'm not going to write the entire story here. It's a thick book, with over 800 pages. So did he get acquited? Did they get together? There were so many twists in the story, and many of them touched my heart. Especially when they wrote letters to each other when they were apart. I also like reading the parts when they made love, as if they were perfectly made for each other. It's like reading a love novel, but yet it's also a detective mystery with all the suspense and it was also exciting to read how he planned his escape from the country with the Interpol and FBI on his heels. Love it. Never a dull moment. That's why I read from 5pm to 5am, with sheer determination to finish the book.
Have you wondered how do you know when a woman really loves a man?
Zach knew it, because when he was a millionaire reduced to a convict with nothing to offer a woman, no future, no $$$, no family, Julie was the one who stuck by him and never gave up on him.
I once asked jw why he would like a gal like me too. (yes, the hard question that gals always like to ask) No $$$, no looks or hot bod, and endless tantrums for him to bear with. (hmmm, right, not so jialat lar, at least I have a heart to offer. Haha) He told me a similar thing. He said when he flunked his final year results, failing his FYP and stats (for the 5th time), and a good chance of being retained and having to paid liquifying damages to the navy, I was the one who was by his side, didn't despise him and didn't leave him in the lurch and went in search of someone better.
Is it true, this "When I had nothing left in my world, you were the one who was there for me.." theory? Is that how we really differentiate true love from superficial relationships? I dunno. I guess it does, to a certain extent.
Zach's previous wife and all his flings were Hollywood actresses who were superficial, only after his $$$ or his looks, or craving to have this award-winning director cast them in his next show. They were pretentious, materialistic, and FAKE. Julie was the only one true to ther heart, she was innocent and genuine. Oh yeah, she was fearless and she scolded Zach alot during the kidnap, but at least she was BEING herself, and not faking it.
Alot of people in the real world are pretentious too, don't you think so? Kinda irritating isn't it? & worse is when you can't tell whether he/she is real or fake, till something bad happens in your life, and you start to discern who are your true frenz. Something bad HAS to happen, before you realise who are the ones who walk away, and who are the ones who stay.
I guess I'm glad I found alot of true friends in my life. And jw, well, there's no debate and no doubt to his personality. He is who he is, and never for once in these 5 years had he pretended to be what he's not. So, if you really love him, you will love him for he is. I dunno how to express my thanks to him for also accepting me whole-heartedly, for who I am, and never asking me to change for the better. I guess, he is the one who taught me the meaning of true love and acceptance.
Perhaps we are really perfect for each other. =)
Well, I dunno why I'm getting so emo nowadays. (or maybe I've always been so). I can feel tears in my eyes even when I walk home alone after my piano class, when I think about our love and what we've gone through. When I think about the joy we are going to experience together. When I think about how blessed and fortunate I am. It's not pre-wedding blues ley (cos I cry for happy reasons, not sad reasons), so I dunno what this is.
But honestly, crying makes me feel good sometimes. Yeah yeah, call me weird. But I felt good after last nite. And somehow it makes me even more appreciative of my life and my love and the people around me.
That's all I have to say for tonite. =)
~Summer~ 11:53 PM